When Slow Feels Like Too Much: Chronic Illness, Anxiety & the Neurodivergent Nervous System

Living with chronic illness often means having no choice but to slow down. Our bodies demand it. Rest becomes sacred, and pacing ourselves isn’t just a suggestion—it’s a survival skill. But here’s the twist no one talks about enough: sometimes slowing down makes our anxiety louder.

For those of us who are neurodivergent, this dissonance can feel like being trapped in a loop. We crave peace, stillness, and rest… but once we get it, our minds start racing. The quiet becomes too loud. The to-do list we’re ignoring hums in the background. The discomfort of inactivity starts to feel like failure. Suddenly, the “rest” we fought so hard for feels like it’s working against us.

The Vicious Cycle

Chronic illness often comes with unpredictability—flare-ups, fatigue, doctor visits, cognitive fog. Anxiety thrives in unpredictability. It latches onto the uncertainty and makes a home there, whispering what ifs into every crack of your schedule.

Add neurodivergence into the mix—ADHD, autism, sensory sensitivities—and the nervous system is already working overtime. We feel deeply. We overthink. We sometimes struggle to regulate or even name what we feel. So when our body tells us “slow down,” but our brain screams “do something,” it’s easy to feel stuck, dysregulated, and overwhelmed.

The good news? There are ways to interrupt the spiral—tools to ground us, soothe us, and remind us we are not powerless in the face of our anxiety.

3 Simple Tools for Easing Anxiety

1. Name It Out Loud

Anxiety thrives in silence. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is simply say, “I’m feeling anxious right now.” Naming the feeling out loud—even if you’re alone—externalizes it. It shifts the energy. It helps the nervous system feel seen. If you’re able, talk to someone you trust, even just to say “today is a lot.”

✨Pro tip: Pair this with touch. Put a hand over your heart or on your belly as you speak. Let your body hear your truth too.

2. Redirect, Gently

Distraction gets a bad rap, but in moments of high anxiety, redirecting your focus can be a lifeline. Think of it as changing the channel on your mental radio. Try:

• Taking a short walk outside

• Watching a comfort movie or funny show

• Listening to instrumental music or nature sounds

• Doing something creative (drawing, doodling, painting, journaling—even badly)

You’re not ignoring the anxiety. You’re creating a little breathing room between you and it.

3. Build Your Coping Toolkit

Having go-to coping strategies you like matters. Think: what brings you ease, even for a moment? Start building a list of things that ground you and keep it somewhere visible. Ideas might include:

• Deep breathing or breath pacing

• Rocking, swaying, or gentle stretching

• Scent (lavender, citrus, or whatever feels good to you)

• Coloring books, puzzles, or games

• Bubble baths or hand massages

None of these need to fix the problem. They’re meant to support you through it.

And a Reminder You Might Need to Hear…

Needing medication for anxiety is not a failure.It’s not weakness. It doesn’t mean you didn’t try hard enough or that you’re broken. Medication is a tool—just like meditation, journaling, or therapy. Some of us need a little more support regulating our brain chemistry, especially when we’re navigating pain, fatigue, and a nervous system that’s already overstimulated.

Let yourself use all the tools that serve you.

Final Thoughts

Living with chronic illness is already hard. Being neurodivergent adds layers most people don’t see. If you find that slowing down makes you feel more anxious, you’re not alone—and you’re not doing it wrong. Your mind and body are just trying to stay safe in a world that often asks too much of them.

Give yourself permission to pause, to cope, to feel it and to redirect. You deserve peace that doesn't come at the cost of your mental health.

And when all else fails? Say it out loud. Then take a breath. Then do the next small thing.